Contact

NOTICE: To contact your perfect POTUS about KEEPING AMERICA GREAT, CLICK HERE. For all other (unimportant) issues, read EVERY WORD below CAREFULLY, OK?

Dear Poorly Educated Voter,

Congrats on wanting to send your cute little opinion to WHITEHOUSE.ORG, where let’s be honest, nobody gives a fuck what you think, loser. And even if I did, my staff is jumping ship way too fast to waste MANpower reading bitchy emails from morons so piss-poor and unimportant, they have time to scribble their lousy brain farts on the internets. Anyway, I’ve really got America bent over a barrel now, and I’m so busy deep-dicking her tight little shitter like one of my creamy-assed porn sluts, I don’t listen to anyone — let alone some nobody sucker like you. But tell you what: if you ever bank a few billion, you can pay full price for a Mar-a-Lago membership and come whisper fabulous treason stuff my ear any time, OK?

—
Donald J. Trump®
Your Horse-Cocked POTUS
https://WHITEHOUSE.ORG
 

ВНИМАНИЕ: переходя по ссылке НАЖМИТЕ ЗДЕСЬ выше, вы подтверждаете, что являетесь типичным американским дебилом, который вскоре станет побежденным рабом Матери России после того, как верховный и отважный лидер Владимир Путин свергает вашу дерьмовую страну и использует свой гигантский 33-сантиметровый член, чтобы Трахни Дональда Трампа глубоко в его отвратительно раздутую прямую кишку кита.

KING DONALD J. TRUMP

Donald J. Trump: America’s most kick-ass President EVER! More famous than dirty hippy Jesus, he’s so fucking classy, he even shits in a SOLID GOLD TOILET. SO BOW & WORSHIP HIS MAGNIFICENT PRIAPIC TUMESCENCE, YOU WORTHLESS PISS-POOR LOSERS!

The 5th of May FREEDOM FIESTA

TACO 'BOUT A nICE PARTY! Calling All Dreamers! Join El Hefe Trump® for fun, Fritos, and foreigners! Friday, May 5, 2017 White House South Lawn FREE to the pigmented public! Leave your ID at home! Fabulous Prizes: All-expenses paid vacations to exotic Tijuana!...

Stephen K. Bannon: EX-NEVER-President

[UPDATED 8/18/2017 FOR ACCURACY & PRE-RETRIBUTION] Stephen K. Bannon is WAS the TOP-SECRET acting Chief Executive of the United States of America UNTIL HE BLABBED ABOUT IT TO EVERY LIBTARD MSM JOURNO IN THE WORLD!!! He believes that America has a Jesus-ordained...

ON SALE NOW: “Winter Situation Room” VIP All-Access Pass!

Join Trump® Mar-a-Lago today to enjoy fabulous front-row seats at ALL weekend nuclear crises! Free hot & cold buffet included! Supplies limited!

Melania® Presents: The FLOTUS™ Collection

Introducing Melania® FLOTUS™ – “So good for ‘float us’ over dirty ground waters into penthouse with Evian waters!” ON SALE NOW! ? ? ?? ?

Ask The First Ladies

After a lucky Trump® White House supporter won our free lottery (and her check cleared), First Ladies Melania®, Ivanka®, Ivana® Trump & Marla Maples jumped on a conference call to... MAKE THIS AMERICAN GREAT AGAIN! To submit YOUR question, email...

Executive Order On Gender Urination Stagefright

Believe me, so-called “Trans” people should feel lucky they’re not pissing in a bucket around the corner…

TEST – FRONTEND UPLOADER

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Standing Up For LAW ENFORCEMENT

THE PRESIDENT: As all my addresses to Joint Sessions of Congress will make abundantly clear: America is, basically, a costume party. If you wear a uniform, you get worshipped -- no questions asked. You can riddle a black teenager, who's begging for mercy, with bullets...

President Responds To Terror-Loving Airport Trespassers

Be SCARED, because at any moment you could be murdered at Carl’s Junior by a one-legged Syrian war orphan!

CROOKED HILLARY: First 100 Days

THE PRESIDENT: You know, I’ve been laughing my ass off all morning, thinking that right now, somewhere in Chappaqua, Crooked Hillary is looking up from Huma’s "wherever," still crawling out from getting #SCHLONGED by a landslide so bigly that it would make God in...