Author: johnwooden

SNITCHES GET RICHES! Make America Pure Again!

SNITCHES GET RICHES!Make America Pure Again! Have you spotted a so-called “person” who seems suspiciously less American than you? Report them preemptively today and YOU will be helping the brave patriots of Immigration & Customs Enforcement (ICE) fulfill President Trump’s mandate to bleach the mottled Michael Jackson face of today’s mongrel America. Submit your sightings of exotically “other” persons here for a chance to win fabulous Trump® luxury goods and services*, and take comfort in knowing that YOU named suspiciously vowel-rich names to help Make the USA Pure Again! #MUSAPA SNITCH TOLL-FREE: CALL 844-ICED-OUT ICE ANONYMOUS SNITCH SYSTEM: YOUR INFORMATION:...

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Exclusive Ivanka Trump Book Excerpt

Enjoy this illuminating excerpt from First Lady-Daughter/Secretary of State Ivanka® Trump’s scintillating new page-turner, “Women Who Work Their Daddies” – available now HARDCOVER FULL RETAIL ONLY at fine Trump® Resort Gift Emporiums worldwide.   6 SECRETS TO LANDING THE JOB OF YOUR DREAMS! Embrace Your Legacy: It doesn’t matter if your are born a slave to, like, a person, or a slave to your Google Calendar, reading my “curated” quotations from some Toni Morrison person about slavery will make you feel your oppression, look up from the page and yell, “Nobody knows da sufferin’ I knows!” So, whether you...

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TACO ‘BOUT A nICE PARTY! Calling All Dreamers! Join El Hefe Trump® for fun, Fritos, and foreigners! Friday, May 5, 2017 White House South Lawn FREE to the pigmented public! Leave your ID at home! Fabulous Prizes: All-expenses paid vacations to exotic Tijuana!...

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Nice Snitching!

Nice Snitching! Great job, fair-complected Patriot! You’ve successfully ratted out some inferior foreign dirt person who’ll soon be explaining themselves to the business end of the ICE battering ram that’s smashing down their cheap apartment’s front door. #MAGA!   Far-fetched? Alas, not so much. Candidate Trump ran on a platform of terrorizing immigrants, and today he is fulfilling that promise, effectively transforming Immigration & Customs Enforcement into a paramilitary force that tears apart families to broadcast a message of intimidation, replete with the new propaganda arm “VOICE.” Please show your opposition to these cruel and deeply un-American policies today...

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