Melania® Presents: The White House Makeover

THE PRESIDENT: [Inhales sharply.] OK, wait until you see how serious I deliver this. So serious. And. Very. Very. Presidential. Like, Sean Hannity will be totally creaming in his pinstripe slacks any second now, folks.

Today, 50 days into my administration, a worshipful national pride stirs in the nine-in-five Americans who voted against Crooked Hillary…

Obamacare Horror Stories Submit Yours! THE PRESIDENT: Folks, it doesn't matter if Ryancare a.k.a. "The American Healthcare Act" went down in flames. Going forward - just out of spite - my entire strategy is to let Obamacare EXPLODE - no matter how many people end up...

Jerry Falwell Jr. of Liberty University was fantastic on “Fox & Friends.” The Fake News should listen to what he had to say. Thanks Jerry!

POTUS: My job is to make every asthmatic brat on earth gasp & wheeze & wish they’d never been born such pathetic rejects! #ParisAccord

POTUS welcomes bids fond farewell to carefully vetted, 1000% LOYAL Tony Scaramucci to WHITEHOUSE.ORG. So great to be have briefly been working with a life-long fan! ??? ###  

100% regular, all-American person “Andy from Arkansas” has wise words for stupid losers who think POTUS secretly loves glorious Mother Russia!

Trump® White House totally gets back at FAKE news @NYtimes ? by not letting them in room?when Sean Spicer avoids everyone else's questions! - @FantasticPOTUS ###

I told you, NOBODY knows more about national security than me, folks! So safe! #MAGA - @FantasticPOTUS

“Obamacare” meant Obama himself was using his bare hand to give little
white girls pelvic exams…