Melania® Presents: The White House Makeover

FIRST LADY IN EXILE: Welcome to my White House Residence Makeover! I using high fashion design for redecorate White House so classy. Add puff of gold here, make quaint room for pouting there!  – Melania® Trump

###

 

An America-Only JOBS & GROWTH Plan

THE PRESIDENT: To stimulate jobs, we must gut any and all regulations that stand in the way of profit at any cost. That's why for every new regulation, I will require that two be eliminated! Which ones? Pick out of a hat -- I don’t care. Details are for nosy Special...

President’s Blueprint For Israeli Peace

OK - 1, 2, 50 state solution? I don't care. According to Bannon, Jesus is going to destroy that whole ugly dustbowl anyhow. Luckily there's always room at MY Inn: Trump® #MiddleEast Resorts! - @FantasticPOTUS

That So-Called “Race” Stuff

My base thinks it’s hilarious I’m calling them “thugs” –a word that everyone knows is code for “horny urban negro.”

People Are Saying: TRUMPCARE® ROCKS!

People Are Saying: TRUMPCARE® ROCKS! Darlene Johnson - Head Mop at the Porn Palace in Knoxville TN, shares her inspiring tale of overcoming stupid Obamacare's #FAKENEWS to arrive at a TRUMPCARE® MIRACLE!   ###  

Ask The First Ladies

After a lucky Trump® White House supporter won our free lottery (and her check cleared), First Ladies Melania®, Ivanka®, Ivana® Trump & Marla Maples jumped on a conference call to... MAKE THIS AMERICAN GREAT AGAIN! To submit YOUR question, email...

Obamacare Horror Stories: Submit Yours!

Obamacare Horror Stories Submit Yours! THE PRESIDENT: Folks, it doesn't matter if Ryancare a.k.a. "The American Healthcare Act" went down in flames. Going forward - just out of spite - my entire strategy is to let Obamacare EXPLODE - no matter how many people end up...

President Trump’s First 100 Days

#TRUMP100DAYS: In his first magnificent, tumescent, godlike 100 days, President Donald J. Trump has recited bold words to restore his family's prosperity, keep Americans safe from inconvenient information, and hold everyone else in government accountable, while...

President Responds To Terror-Loving Airport Trespassers

Be SCARED, because at any moment you could be murdered at Carl’s Junior by a one-legged Syrian war orphan!

Executive Order On Gender Urination Stagefright

Believe me, so-called “Trans” people should feel lucky they’re not pissing in a bucket around the corner…

White House Counsels Kellyanne Conway on Hawking Ivanka Trump® Shoes on TV

“White House employees know they are to pimp only the full-price Trump merchandise,” Chief of Staff Reince Priebus reiterated in a statement to the press.