Today, 50 days into my administration, a worshipful national pride stirs in the nine-in-five Americans who voted against Crooked Hillary…

By Popular Demand: Jared Kushner, ethically spotless Sr. White House Advisor & Secretary Of All the Complicated Stuff, goes on the record regarding his alleged treason.

THE PRESIDENT: [Inhales sharply.] OK, wait until you see how serious I deliver this. So serious. And. Very. Very. Presidential. Like, Sean Hannity will be totally creaming in his pinstripe slacks any second now, folks.

ATTENTION PATRIOTS: President Trump will not rest until Obamacare is DEAD; bled out and hanging from the branch of a tree like a freshly bagged cheetah on safari. YOU CAN HELP: Submit your #OBAMACAREHORROR Story @ WHITEHOUSE.ORG/OBAMACARE-HORROR today! ###...

We will ban from entering America all swarthy persons from the world’s most dangerous hotbeds…

I am releasing this letter to the news media first, specifically so I can reference to informing me, on THREE separate occasions, that I AM TOTALLY NOT UNDER INVESTIGATION!

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All whiny injuns will be bulldozed into their precious sacred rivers, just before they get deluged with…

Sick of FAKE NEWS! Take this NON-FAKE survey to show HUGE public support for when POTUS starts rounding up scumbag reporters!

“I looking even more pretty when sit next ugly ‘Goatse Tree’ planted by frumpy lesbian Eleanor Roosevelt, no?”