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The White House is an equal opportunity employer; anyone, regardless of light-skinned race, Christian denomination or masculine
gender, who doesn't agree with Mr. Cheney may be terminated without notice. Your compensation package, in addition to a Stetson and KJV
Bible, offers competitive federal benefits (unavailable in the private sector) including health, life, and afterlife insurance coverage,
monogrammed handgun lockers, and opportunities for nearly unimaginable financial advancement through post-White House
tell-all book deals, your own talk show on FOX NEWS, outlandish speaking fees, sitting on the boards of companies that make stuff
you know nothing about, or simply marketing your perceived influence to corporations that would rather pay lobbyists than
class action settlements. Knowledge of US laws, statutes, the Constitution and international treaties may interfere with your
ability to follow administration policy and is, therefore, discouraged. Resumes and cover letters for
available positions may be submitted via the official contact form.
CURRENT OPENINGS:
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White House Information:
